Top 10 Reasons The Patriots Will Beat The Giants

by Erik North on February 5, 2012

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Update: Obviously this didn’t work out. Like I said in the comments, 2 weeks til pitchers and catchers report.

I’ll get back to standard postings tomorrow. Until then…

Top 10 Reasons The Patriots Will Beat The Giants

Despite the better record, stats and point spread in Vegas, most experts are picking the Giants over the Pats in the Super Bowl. Most New Englanders disagree and I threw together a list of reasons why the Patriots will win tonight.

10) 100% mortal lock: some dude you’ve never heard of unless you are the Patriot’s equipment manager will have a pick-6 interception.

9) Gisele will divorce Tom Brady if she doesn’t get one Super Bowl ting to match Bridget Moynahan’s three.

8 – (This is cracking me up…the one on Belichick’s good mood keeps changing the 8 to a smiley emoticon) Belichick’s bizarrely cheerful demeanor this week means either he’s lost his mind or he’s about to own Manning like the Gimp in ‘Pulp Fiction’.

7) The third most famous classic blunder is never bet against adorable 350 pound teddy bears nose tackles.

6) Only way for the country to learn about this hidden secret Gronkowski kid is a ‘despite-it-all’ Super Bowl coming out party. I am party.

5) Tom Brady has been struggling to find ways to make his life more perfect, will settle for another Super Bowl win.

4) In New England, we always follow horrible crushing collapses with championship wins we doubt every step of the way. It’s when we take it for granted that we get in trouble (’07 Pats, ’11 Sox).

3) The gods of sports wouldn’t stand for 10 years of inane ‘is Eli better than Peyton’ talk. Seriously? This is a question?

2) I was talking with a friend a few weeks back, remembering the 1985 Super Bowl and other Pat’s teams and his 10-year-old son chimed in, “But the Patriots never lose.”

1) Myra Kraft didn’t go to all that trouble to knock down a pass and deflect a field goal to let the Super Bowl slip away.

Go Pats!

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